Hey there. It’s Jason Stedman, author of Catch Him & Keep Him.
I want to tell you a little bit about myself… that’s why you’re on the page after all, right?
I’d like to tell you how I got to this place in my life and why I chose this path to help women with dating and finding lasting and committed love in their lives. I think it’s important for you to not only understand WHY I created these programs but also, HOW I think about dating, love and relationships.
The truth is: I think that love is the only thing that really ever made sense to me, ever since a young age. It always felt like everything else in life paled in comparison to the reciprocating belief that another person cares for you, will be there for you, and has you in their mind and best intentions, at all times.
Because when you have love, it radiates throughout your entire life. It’s exciting. It’s determined. Some might even say that love is blinding… but I disagree, in fact, I think the exact opposite – I think that love is ILLUMINATING. Love is the light that guides us.
Here’s a quote I like:
“The sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light of meaning in the darkness of mere being.”
It’s from Carl Jung.
A quote that was recited by my wife and myself at our wedding and a quote that I have tattooed on my arm – permanently.
There are many implications of this quote but the one I’ve always chosen to focus on is related to love. Specifically, that love is the highest form of human achievement… it is the light… it is what illuminates and guides us. It is the only thing that truly matters. To pull another quote:
“ Love is all you need.”
The simplicity of this statement can be overwhelming. I mean, how can something so simple and innate be so hard. How can we let the complexity and burden of our lives make us lose sight of the most important thing to us all. Or to call back to Jung – how can we let ourselves “fall victim to unconsciousness?”
And this is where my journey really starts.
The struggle we all have with dating and relationships that prevents us from getting the very thing that we all want in life, the very thing that matters most in life – THIS is what has driven me for over 15 years in the dating and relationship advice field.
From a young age, I saw my mother struggle with this… she divorced my dad when I was very young and I lived through the pain and heartbreak she went through time and time again as a working single mom.
I was too young to really “get it” but I saw the tears… I felt the loneliness… and it left an indelible mark on me.
I mean, can you imagine walking in on your hardworking, loving, dedicated, intelligent, caring mother hiding in her room with her face in her hands, sobbing quietly because she didn’t want her little boy to see her “weak” and upset?
I can.
It sucked.
And I couldn’t imagine why someone so loveable could feel so unloved.
Years later, my mom did find a man that had mutual love and respect for her and they got married. They were together for most of my young adult life and while the marriage seemed perfect in the beginning, it wasn’t long before the shine wore off and old patterns returned.
Perhaps they still had respect for each other but that most important thing (love) was, once again, being lost in the shuffle of daily responsibilities and driven away by unconscious behaviors.
They finally divorced a few years after I graduated from college. At this point I was old enough to see the patterns and behaviors – to see how misunderstanding, a lack of perspective and unconscious belief structures were destroying the fabric of their relationship and suffocating the love they had for each other.
People talk a lot about their “lightbulb moment”… and this was mine.
It’s not that love and relationships weren’t a constant theme throughout my life, it’s just that I had never considered that there were behavior patterns and belief structures that could be CHANGED – that the loss of love and the struggle to find and keep love in your life, was SOLVABLE.
And I want to be completely transparent with whoever is reading this – it took me a long time to solve this in my own life… and I still have to work on it, every damn day.
It took me years to get to the place I am now… and it took me making a lot of mistakes; horrible and gut wrenching mistakes, before I was ready to be in a place to find and keep the love I have now (and conversely, to be caught and kept myself!!)
But this broken, ugly past (of my own behavior, of witnessing my mom’s struggle, seeing friend’s struggle) – combined with my education and the constant belief that love is the most important thing in our lives, puts me in a unique position to deliver the most comprehensive, honest and proven advice for dating and relationships.
I say this a lot… but the proof is in the pudding.
Not only has Catch Him & Keep Him helped millions of women (and yeah, that’s not just some made up number – MILLIONS) but I applied what I learned (all the tools, techniques and strategies) to my own life – I was my first test subject and it’s how I was able to be married to the love of my life. A woman who I admire, respect and look up to, as much as I love deeply. And a woman who chose to have a family with me and who chose to carry two little boys into this world.
And this is not something I take for granted. In fact, every year my wife and I get re-married (on the date of our anniversary) in a new state in the US – this isn’t a superfluous act; we do it to consciously reconnect and remind ourselves why we are together. And it also gives us the opportunity to amend or evolve our vows to the people we have become and the needs we have now. The truth is…
I get to live my dream life and live with love. I get to hold the light that illuminates the darkness
And that’s EXACTLY what I want to give you.
And let’s be clear about it… it’s no small feat, it’ll take work – but I did the hard work to help you cut through years (or, maybe, decades) of heartache and loneliness and deliver only the best of the best advice, tools and techniques to you.
I’m not doing this purely because I love… well, love.
I’m doing this because the impact of the work is gratifying and motivating… and, most importantly, because I don’t want any girl or woman to have to go through what my mom went through.
All the happiness in life and love,
